Adam's Song (Ron's Song)
by Princess of Punk
Summary: Quite depressing. My third songfic to Blink 182. A lot different that the other ones though. Ron goes through a terrible crisis...r/r please.


**Adam's Song (now Ron's song)**  


  
  
  
  
_I never thought I'd die alone   
  
_I looked around. I'm back home, out of school-no, done with school. I have been for two years. And these two years have been like hell. So I came back here. It's not helping._  
  
I laughed the loudest, who'd have known?   
  
_Who'd've? I had been happy, back when I could go by and not worry about when I grew up. Now I'm back in my room, wondering what the point of life is. To die._  
  
I traced the cord back to the wall   
  
_The cord. The cord that's plugged into my phone, on which no one calls._  
  
No wonder it was never plugged in at all   
  
_Why bother. _  
  
I took my time, I hurried up   
  
_No one was really there for me. I tried advice from Harry, Hermione, my family, everybody...but now I'm just a loser who couldn't ever think for himself. It took me ninteen years to figure that out. Ninteen years that I didn't deserve to live. _  
  
The choice was mine, I didn't think enough   
  
_I didn't. I thought what Percy would think. But he's gone. I thought of what Bill would think. Gone. Charlie? Gone. Fred and George? Ginny? All gone, with good lives, no time for rejected brother._  
  
I'm too depresed to go on, you'll be sorry when I'm gone.  
  
_Would they ever. Make them feel guilty. But did I really have enough courage to do this? Or was I really ready for something, this time._   
  
I never conqured, rarely came   
16 just held such better days   
Days when I still felt alive   
We couldn't wait to get outside   
The world was watching   
Hate to try   
The day was over we'd surivied   
I couldn't wait till I got home   
To pass the time in my room alone   
  
_My room. The only comfort these days. I've been here on and off for the two years I've been out of school._  
  
I never thought I'd die alone  
  
_I am alone. Sure, maybe someone notices me, if say, I hit them over the head with a frying pan. Even Harry and Hermione couldn't comfort me. I'm just going to be in my room when they find me. _  
  
Another six months, I'll be unknown   
  
_I would. I live in my room. No one ever sees me. No one thinks that I, the stupid little poor redhead could ever do such a brave thing, except maybe Harry. But there won't be another six months._  
  
Give all my things to all my friends   
  
_I didn't have anything of great value. But I took my life savings, my personal possessions, and then...the letters I had written, over time. Make them feel even guiltier. I put them on my bed._  
  
You'll never step foot in my room again   
  
_My room will be a nightmare._  
  
You'll close it off, board it up   
  
_No one will want to remember me. It's either because it's too painful to think about me or they don't care enough to. _  
  
Remember the time that I spilled the cup   
  
_Memories..._  
  
Of apple juice in the hall   
  
_I had gotten yelled at. That was the time that the depression started. I was going into my final year of Hogwarts, a fresh, new seventeen year old. I had even gotten new robes and scales. But I was going to give the apple juice to Percy, he had come for a visit. But I tripped. I spilled it all over him. He yelled at me. He told me I was worthless. People have called me things worse than that before, but this time it stuck. I was obbsessed with dying. It stuck with me for the last year of Hogwarts, and the two years after. _  
  
Please tell mom this is not her fault   
  
_I don't think it's Percy's, someone would've said that to me eventually. Mom could've been there more, but I've become so isolated that she rarely even comes to my door anymore. No one does._  
  
I never conqured, rarely came   
16 just held such better days   
Days when I still felt alive   
We couldn't wait to get outside   
The world was watching   
Hate to try   
The day was over we'd surivied   
I couldn't wait till I got home   
To pass the time in my room alone   
  
_It was now or never. There was a gun. A shiny, muggle weapon. I stole it. All I would have to do is pull the little trigger and the pain would die. I would too.  
  
I picked it up. It would be so easy. No one was home. They wouldn'd find me until they got back. If they cared. So I slipped my will onto my bed along with my letters, and on top of those, a poem. I knew that I would be happier gone. I knew that...that...something was waiting for me. I could join the already gone people. I could...I could...could...could...  
  
_  
_Ron's poem:  
_  
I never conqured, rarely came   
Tomorrow holds such better days   
Days when I can still feel alive   
When I can't wait to get outside   
The world is watching   
The time goes by   
The day is over I'd surivied   
I can't wait till I get home   
To pass the time in my room alone  
  
  
_A/N: I finally finished something! I tried romance, humor, action...but nothing was working for me. Finally, I finished something! Pretty depressing story. If you need some lightening up, just read my "other" Blink 182 pieces. Very different from this one! :)  



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